24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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