I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
