Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Operation Purity has been aborted
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
