So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
