i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
