Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize