I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Reggie can tackle my bush.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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