do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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