Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
The convent might be a nice break from real life
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