You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
