Having a random hookup so left but love u
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Enjoy the penises
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
