he wants to bone in the snuggie
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
