You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
