i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
