"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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