On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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