Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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