Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
