were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
