Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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