Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
