Texts From Last Night

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  (518): View more from New York

  She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.

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  (518): She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog. http://tfl.nu/0zps
  Replies (10) Good night (750) Bad night (2799)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  You can't special order awesome

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  (404): You can't special order awesome http://tfl.nu/116h
  Replies (14) Good night (2982) Bad night (699)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.

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  (301): all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol. http://tfl.nu/ssjg
  Replies (11) Good night (3892) Bad night (883)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."

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  (617): i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex." http://tfl.nu/vl6s
  Replies (24) Good night (4952) Bad night (780)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!

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  (281): I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy! http://tfl.nu/gg3p
  Replies (51) Good night (5264) Bad night (969)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.

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  (610): Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever. http://tfl.nu/x9w2
  Replies (33) Good night (1040) Bad night (4326)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.

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  (517): we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic. http://tfl.nu/tadi
  Replies (11) Good night (8923) Bad night (2100)
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  (559): View more from California

  I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper

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  (559): I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper http://tfl.nu/pzfa
  Replies (21) Good night (5066) Bad night (1646)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Wow that was a lesbian tornado.

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  (201): Wow that was a lesbian tornado. http://tfl.nu/1am2
  Replies (14) Good night (3626) Bad night (1113)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.

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  (706): I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery. http://tfl.nu/adx0
  Replies (7) Good night (1717) Bad night (622)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."

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  (973): Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke." http://tfl.nu/posr
  Replies (5) Good night (2030) Bad night (737)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.

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  (505): I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome. http://tfl.nu/rp6m
  Replies (5) Good night (1114) Bad night (352)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists

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  (902): We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club (902): The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists http://tfl.nu/vl5e
  Replies (5) Good night (1196) Bad night (365)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.

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  (+44): If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned. http://tfl.nu/qyit
  Replies (8) Good night (494) Bad night (1309)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.

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  (608): I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style. http://tfl.nu/y30w
  Replies (1) Good night (419) Bad night (272)

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