If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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