I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
