There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
