She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
