yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
