actually, I'm a sock model
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
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