I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You may now shotgun with the bride
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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