My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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