ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
