in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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