I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
