this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
