I think I died a long time ago.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
its not stalking. its research.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
