It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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