he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
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