What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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