i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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