So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
