question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize