I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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