I didn't shave. On purpose
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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