Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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