Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize