I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
it's like heaven, but drunker
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
