It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
