i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
