you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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