Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize