Me too!
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
